Wow, I haven't cooked in so long!

     Dudes, it's been a while. It took so much longer to find a place than I thought. Britain makes that shit so hard. We arrived here in Bristol expecting to find a place within a week or two. In Vancouver that's pretty realistic, but since we're a couple we ended up teaming up with an awesome couple (one American, one Polish) to find a flat.
    We thought we had found a place, but the guys so SO sketchy, trying to get us to give him 1000 pounds and leave to photocopy the forms without a receipt or anything. We obviously told him that made us super uncomfortable and that we could photocopy the papers then give him the money after. He told us there was absolutely no way, and that we made him uncomfortable and he didn't want us as tenants. Such bullshit! Long story short, we almost got scammed. In the end we found a really cool flat with an agency, but had to wait two and a half weeks to get it.
     My point is this: I haven't really had a kitchen until now, so I couldn't make good food. I've missed cooking and there are some interesting differences here for people with stomach issues. Here is a list:

• British people love sub-par Italian food.
• They deep fry every fucking thing in batter
• Kebabs. Everywhere.
• No gluten-free anything, except one chain of sub-par Italian restaurants.
• They sell goat's milk in most supermarkets! 
• They use the French names for veg sometimes, and have no idea what it is if you say it in English. (Eggplant for example, is aubergine.)
• British people have NO CLUE how to make a decent sandwich.
• Every person ever grows rosemary and lavender

     So, when we moved into our flat, the first thing I did, obviously was cook. I'm gonna be honest, I wasn't super happy with the result, so I have to fiddle around with the goat's milk bechamel (a white sauce) and get back to you guys when I perfect that.

     But what I did make was rosemary and lavender chicken breasts. Omg, guys. It was so good. What I did was ninja some fresh lavender, rosemary, and hydrangeas from someone's garden. Rosemary and lavender for the chicken, hydrangeas for the centre piece. (I take other people's flowers and herbs because I suck at growing my own, sorry.)
    When I got home, I threw some oil in a cooking tray, sprinkled my chicken with salt, pepper, rosemary, lavender and lemon juice. Then I Threw it in the over for 15-20 mins. It was great. Unlike the rest of the meal. I was assured it was good, but it wasn't my best, so you don't get to see it.

     Stick around kids, next week I'm going to Belgium, so hopefully there will be posts about me eating mussels in Brussels, etc etc. Then when I get back, I'm gonna make some posts about the awesome cider here~ Bristol may not be a gluten-free place to eat, but they sure do love their cider! Also, maybe I'll get better photos because one of my roommates is a photographer, and I've basically been taking my pictures with a potato.

Later days,
Brittney

Sometimes I skip dinner and just eat dessert.

Well guys, my aunt brought to my attention that I haven't really brought up my dietary restrictions. I can't have wheat or gluten, dairy, corn (probably just the by-products, but I haven't tested that yet), potatoes and yeast (but I mostly ignore that). It's a lot, I know. That's just a heads up, because most of the recipes I post will be free of all that. But, if you're wanting to see a recipe cater to your specific restriction, just hit me up and I'll see what I can do~

Okay, I've been cooking a lot lately. It's picture sharing time! Excite!!

Peanut butter and banana french toast sandwhich on gluten free bread~

Lamb with a gremolata about to go in the oven.

Finished lamb with a samosa-style twice baked yam.

Hasselback potatoes (and a yam for me and my aunt).

Yay!! I make things taste good~ But the recipe I'm going to share with you today is one I just made up on the spot. I needed to use some rhubarb I picked yesterday, and some strawbs that were nearing the end in the fridge. I was the strawberry hero.

And guess what! I measured things for you, because I love you so much. Just kidding, I on;t half measured them. Because I half love you so much? I tried, anyways. So here, take it:

Shortbread crust:

• 1c gluten free flour
• 1/2c sugar
• 1c butter or something dairy free. I used vegan margarine (boooooo, use butter if you can).

Filling:

•  2c rhubarb chopped up
• 2c strawbs
• 1/2c brown sugar
• 1/2 tsp black pepper (seriously, try it. Go on.)

Crumble topping:

•  2 or 3 healthy spoonfuls of butter (or like, you know, whatever)
• 3 nice big handfuls of slow cook oats (because gluten free oats take their time)
• Some brown sug

HERE'S HOW TO PUT IT TOGETHER

Do yourself a favour and preheat that oven. 350. Mix your shortbread things up, and in a greased pan throw that in the bottom, like this:

Put some fork holes in that shit and bake it for about 10 mins.

While that bakes, you can mix your other shit in separate bowls.

Bowl 1

Bowl 2

Take your shortbread crust out, let it cool for 10 mins if you want. I'm impatient, so I really didn't. Then put the filling on the shortbread, and crumble your crumble on top~

 Put it back in for like... 25 minutes? My aunt has a convection oven, so it doesn't take as long for anything, but 25 should be fine.

This is what I got in the end:

  

And I have to say that this is stupid good. YUM!!! I'm eating it right now. Let me know if you add your own spin on it~

Later days, 

Brittney

 

It's Getting Warm Out~ (Even in Canada)

Lately I've been "paying rent" at my Aunt and Uncle's house while we wait out Jake's visa application by cooking dinner. For the first week my Uncle was away (he's a pretty traditional guy), so I could make whatever I wanted (since my Aunt has an adventurous pallet), but now that he's back, I'm challenging myself to make some more traditional things. I grew up in a household that ate A LOT of meat and potatoes, so after I moved out and started making my own food, you can bet I stayed far away from that style of cooking. All of this is new to me. Okay, whatever, tomorrow I'm making lamb. It should be tasty.

Tonight is steak (which my Aunt is grilling), but I'm gonna make some hasselback potatoes. They look cool. Here have a picture:

I obviously didn't make that. I have absolutely no photography equipment, and so as you might have noticed, I have to take all my pictures outside.I'm all excited to make these potatoes. They look great!!

Yesterday, I made lasagne. AND because I have time like that, I Wikipedia'd lasagne. I learned that lasagnE is plural, and lasagnA is a single piece of noodle!! I feel smart. Herp derp. I also made lavender frozen custard. It was delissshhhhh.

Recipe!

• 1 can coconut milk - for 2-3 people, but this recipe doubles very easily
• 4 egg yolks
• 1/2-3/4 cup sugar - depending on how sweet you like it. 
• 1 bunch of lavender sprigs tied together with butchers twine
• A cap full of vanilla
• That's it, seriously.

First, you put the can of coconut milk in a pot on the stove with the sugar, vanilla and lavender (med-low heat). While that's all happening, beat your egg yolks till they reach the ribbon stage. Which looks like this:

When your lavender has infused to your taste into the coconut milk, strain it through a fine mesh strainer, then add about 1 cup of it to your eggs SLOWLY. Eggs hate being pressured into doing things they don't want to do. you have to ease them into it, like a cult leader eases his new members. Yeah, you have to love bomb your eggs. Then, when they're tempered, you can put all that back in the pot on low-medium heat and thicken that up. You want your custard to be thick, but still runny.

When your custard is done, strain that to get rid of any cooked egg parts. Those are the enemy. Put your mixture in a cake pan and throw it in the freezer. Stir it around every half hour or so till it's frozen. After you can put it in a container and enjoy the shit out of it.

Your welcome,
Brittney


UPDATE! Jake brought to my attention that the lavender flavour really came out as the ice cream froze (and also as my tea cooled, but you don't know about that, so there). I just wanted y'all to know to be careful about your ice cream being too perfumey because you can't smell it so well when it's hot~

Boy, Do I Have a Story For You!

Jeez, where to start? Well, as you may or may not know, my boyfriend and I had planned to move to Bristol. Notice the past tense. Jake lost his wallet, like 3 hours before our plane left. Yay. Also, he left part of his luggage on the bus. So, after a week of madly running around trying to sort shit out, feeling like we were contestants in the Amazing Race, we finally have everything done. Now, all we have to do is wait. Le sigh.
     "So, what have you been doing this past week, Brittney?", one might ask. (Or one might not, but in that case, one may fuck right off.) Cooking!!!! And also reading about cooking. And also playing Scrabble.

One thing I've made a bunch of this past couple of weeks (mostly to impress people, if I'm being honest) is my Coconut Curry. It's so good you wouldn't know how vegan it is (if you don't add meat, which I do).

Fucking delicious looking, right? If you aren't having a mouthgasm, you're too picky and need to change.

RECIPE!

Ingreeds:

• Coconut milk (from a can) - I use 1 can for every 2 people I'm feeding. 
• Lemongrass - 1 stalk for every can. 
• Lime Leaves - I don't know, just a bunch I guess. 
• Ginger - some.
• Garlic - lots.
• Tumeric - about 1 tbsp?
• Curry powder/cumin/garam masala - to taste
• S+P - to taste
• Meat? Tofu? Other crazy things? - your call.
• AN ONION - I don't care if you "don't like them." You are confused, add it anyways.

Okay, so as you've noticed, I'm not a huge fan of exact measuring. I'm sorry that I'm not sorry.

Moving on, step one: (Cut a hole in the box.) Dice your garlic, peel your ginger (with a spoon works best), beat the living hell out of your lemongrass (seriously, that's what you're supposed to do), and open your coconut milk into a pan or a pot or whatever you have that works. Throw your things I just told you to do stuff with in the cooking vessel. Bring that to a simmer and let it do it's thing for a little while, you want all your ingredients to lend their flavours to your sauce. 

When you can taste the lemongrass (should be about 10-15 mins) and your sauce is quite a bit thicker and more lovely, you should add your spices. Okay, here I'm gonna lecture about tasting your shit as you go, because when you don't bad things are gonna happen. Don't be afraid to spoon your food in and around your mouth before you serve it (okay, maybe not around). After your sauce tastes wonderful, strain it.


While your sauce is simmering, go ahead and cut your veg or whatever. After it's done, you can saute up some garlic and onion in oil. Reduce your heat and add your veg, meat, etc in there. Be mindful of the cooking times of your veg. For instance, if you have broc, add that with your meat, but if you have zucchini, add that quite a bit later since it takes very little time.

When your veg is cooked-ish, deglaze that shit with some white wine. Feel free to experiment with different liquors BTW, I'm just kind of poor. After your wine (or other fancy alcohol, like tequilla or sake) has reduced, pour your sauce into your veg. Let that sauce thicken for a bit.

OKAY PS I forgot to tell you to do up your rice, or noods, depending on preferance, at the same time you're sautéing your veg/meat/aliens. So, yes. Do that.

At the end, when I plate, I garnish with some green onions, because then I look like a fancy cook, and I am. And so can you be.

The end.

-Brittney

TL;DR: If you don't like onions, you aren't cooking them properly.

Pasta fun~

So, I'm moving and can't be bothered to cook at all. I'm eating a lot of sushi lately. However, I did make a wonderful meal for my aunt a while back. It was spaghetti with prawns and coconut mocha panna cotta for dessert.

My foolproof recipe for pasta is so simple!
1 can of whole plum tomatoes
1 diced onion
2 or 3 cloves of garlic
1 tbsp oil
Some salt and pepper
Some white wine

First you gotta heat a pan up on medium heat with oil, then add onions and garlic. When your onions are soft, deglaze with white wine. After you just squeeze the whole tomatoes into the pan. That's my favourite part, but it's also kind of messy. Don't pour the rest of the tomato juice in, you get enough juice from the whole tomatoes. Then add your S and P. Reduce until it's as thick as you like it. That's it.

The reason you don't use fresh tomatoes is because they (I don't really know who "they" are personally) pick them while they're still green and add colour artificially or wait for them to ripen off the vine. The canned tomatoes get picked just when they're perfect and stay that way until they get to you.

This post is probably just a bunch of babble, and I'm sorry. It is a good recipe, and you should try it, but I'm too tired to English.

Blessed be the cheesemakers. (I'm watching Life of Brian.)

Later Days,
Brittney

It's been a while since I made something good.

I'm not gonna lie guys, it's been a long, busy couple of weeks. Since I work in a restaurant, and Mother's Day just passed, I've been crazy busy. I'm kind of exhausted. I got home yesterday from work, took a nap and got kicked out of my apartment because my landlord failed to mention she was showing it...again. SO, when I got back I was all, "Fuck this, I'm baking."

 

BREADDDDD!!!

And what I made was possibly the best thing I've ever made, I'm serious. I made handi-banana bread. SO FREAKING GOOD. It didn't taste handi at all. Light, fluffy, moist. It had everything going. I use past tense because we got drunk and it's obviously all gone now.

PROS:

• fluffy
• moist
• not grainy at all, which I wasn't expecting
• no rise time, because my poor stomach can't even handle yeast
• stupid good

CONS:

• I didn't use a recipe, or even measure anything
• fuck

But I'm trying it out again (not that I measured anything again) but I think I have the ratios down.

Handi-Bread

1.5 cups brown rice flour
0.5 cups white rice flour
2 tbsp tapioca starch
2 tsp guar gum
1 tbsp baking powder
0.5 tsp salt
0.25 cup oil
2 eggs
a bunch of water, maybe 3 cups? maybe more (sorry) (UPDATE: 1.5 cups was enough.)

(If you want the banana bread, add 2 bananas, 1/2 cup carob chips, and 1/2 cup sugar)

1. Set oven for 350, oil a bread pan, and mix them dry ingredients.
2. Add the wet ingredients, and when you add the water make sure it's just a big goopy mess. The trick to baking with rice flour is to add twice the liquid you would use for wheat flour.
3. Slop that delicious mess into your bread pan, and pop it in the oven for like... 30 mins.

I might explode I'm so happy!

Today is a day of many wonderful things, but I literally predicted they would all happen today. Let me bring you back:
     It's Sunday, April 28, and I am a wreck. I tore muscles in my lower back, and I'm freaking out about having to wait for everything. My boyfriend Jake says to me, "I'm sure everything will happen soon."
    To which I replied, "Well, I know. It's all going to happen on Wednesday, but I just want it to happen now."

SO! Here it is, Wednesday, and I get someone buzzing to come up (which never happens because I don't have a huge social life). It's the delivery guy with all of my internet clothes!!! Christmas, right? I've never ordered clothes from the internet before, and let me tell you, it's amazing. I loved every minute of it.

A couple hours later, while making my Roasted Strawberry and Coconut Torte, I get a text from my boyfriend saying to check my email. NEWS: I'm moving to the UK in under 2 months!!!!! Just on a working holiday visa, but it's going to be amazing!!

In other words, my life is awesome right now. Plus I had this great lunch, AND it's my Vancouver family's Game of Thrones and Excellent Dinner Night.

Behold, lunch!! (Excellent miso gravy)

 Also! A recipe today, that I just made up. :)


Roasted Strawberry and Coconut Torte!

First, cut up some strawbs and roast em.

Beaut.

 Next, mix your shit. Since there isn't any baking powder, you really don't have to worry about mixing dry and wet ingredients separately.

Look at that wonderful coconut milk

Add those berries in there, put the mix in an 8X8" add some coconut, fresh strawberries, and some more honey on top.

Look at that yum! 

Recipe:
2 eggs
1/2 cup coconut milk
1/2 cup GF flour (I used rice flour)
A bunch of strawberries
Honey to taste

So Simple!

Later Days,
Brittany